If you’ve spent any time on TikTok or your IG feed lately, you’ve probably seen phrases like “cut them off” or “protect your peace.” These are apart of a bigger trend called cut-off culture, where people are encouraged to walk away from relationships that feel toxic or emotionally exhausting. And yes, there’s truth in protecting your peace, but cutting someone off isn’t always as healing as it seems. So how do you know when cutting ties is a healthy boundary, and when it might be emotional avoidance in disguise? This blog breaks down the difference, and offers tools for navigating tough relationships without just going ghost mode.

What is Cut-Off Culture?

Cut-off culture is the popular practice of ending relationships abruptly, sometimes with no explanation, as a way to protect your mental health.

On social media, this trend is often celebrated with claims like:

“You owe them nothing”
“Cut them off at the first red flag”

… But real relationships are rarely that black and white. Setting emotional boundaries is crucial, but that’s not the same thing as cutting people off the second you feel uncomfortable. One protects your peace while staying emotionally present and the other often avoids deeper conversations altogether.

When is Cutting Someone off Healthy?

There are absolutely times when cutting someone off is the healthiest and safest choice. For example, if someone is:

Emotionally or physically abusive
Manipulative
Repeatedly crossing your boundaries after you've clearly communicated them

In these cases, walking away is an act of self-protection - not coldness or drama. Sometimes, choosing yourself means creating real distance, especially when staying only continues the harm. It doesn’t mean you’re unforgiving. It means you're prioritizing your well-being and protecting that peace!

The Risks of Overusing Cut-Offs

risks of overusing cut-offs in relationships

Not every conflict means a person is toxic. When cut-offs become your default response, they can actually block emotional growth.

Overuse can lead to:

Isolation
Unprocessed emotions
Missed chances to grow in relationships

You may also avoid developing important skills like:

Emotional regulation
Self-awareness
Conflict resolution

Honestly, sometimes we’re quick to cut people off not because they’re harmful, but because we’ve never learned how to handle hard conversations.

Conflict Resolution

Before tapping that block button, ask yourself: “Have I actually tried to talk about it?”

Healthy relationships require real communication, not just cut-offs. An upfront conversation might feel awkward, but it can build trust and clarity. Instead of ghosting, consider:

Expressing how you feel
Setting or resetting boundaries
Taking space without disappearing

If navigating all of this feels overwhelming, therapy can help you figure it out. TCC therapists are available in Calgary and across Canada to support you through complicated dynamics.

When Distance is More Appropriate?

Not every difficult relationship needs a permanent ending. Sometimes what you need most is a break -- some breathing room to reflect and reset. Think of it like hitting mute instead of block.

Taking time apart can help:

Lower emotional tension
Give you space to process your feelings
Offer a clearer perspective on whether the relationship is worth revisiting

If the person is safe but the situation is messy, temporary space might be exactly what your nervous system needs.

Final Thoughts:

Cut-off culture isn’t all bad, it’s a response to people learning how to protect their peace. But not every tough moment calls for a full cut-off. Being intentional is what matters most. Ask yourself if you are doing this to feel safe, or if you are you doing this to avoid feeling uncomfortable. Healthy vs toxic relationships aren’t always easy to tell apart, but reflection helps! Boundaries, connection, space, and repair can coexist. You don’t have to ghost your way into healing. Real peace comes from making mindful choices, not reactive ones.

TLDR:

Cut-off culture teaches us to protect our peace by cutting off relationships that feel unsafe or emotionally draining. Sometimes that’s necessary, especially in the face of abuse or manipulation. But when overused, cut-offs can lead to isolation, missed chances for growth, and emotional avoidance. Before saying goodbye, ask yourself if you’ve tried boundaries, repair, or just taking space. Be intentional, not impulsive. Protect your peace, but stay open to connection, too.

References:

Flett, G. L. (2024, January 5). Should I cut people off or tolerate them? Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/perfectionism/202411/should-i-cut-people-off-or-tolerate-them

Martin, S. (2022, September 1). Cut-off and cut-out: Healing disrupted family relationships. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-full-picture/202209/cut-off-and-cut-out-healing-disrupted-family-relationships

#CutOffCulture Is Trending - But Is It Actually Healthy?